Keeping with the grand tradition they’ve built, ABC’s season finales were over-hyped and completely underwhelming. Some weren’t half bad (Desperate Housewives), while others were completely despicable (Ugly Betty). Regardless of the quality of send-offs, I’m just relieved to take a break from the network for a few months. It’s not that I don’t like them, but more than any other shows, I watch ABC’s Sunday and Thursday night line-ups out of obligation. Like a loving parent who’s a little too excited to send his children off to summer camp, I know I’ll be happy when they return this fall. But for now, I’m just looking forward to a little time to myself.
I don’t like saying “jump the shark.” In addition to the annoying genesis of the phrase and the ridiculous frequency at which it is thrown around, it has always seemed like a grossly uneducated judgment – especially when used in the immediate aftermath of a bad episode. Someone once said that you can’t really judge the success of a presidency until at least 20 years after the end of their term. And while that might not be the exact case with television, you really do need to see how things continue to play out before looking back in hindsight. That said, Ugly Betty might really have jumped the infant shark with the addition of Rebecca Romijn as Daniel’s post-op trannie brother/sister. Her character is far from the show’s biggest weakness, but her mid-season introduction was followed by a steady decline in quality. Last week’s finale was dismal, and if it weren’t for that charming Ferrera girl, I probably wouldn’t be coming back for more next year.
Somewhere in the middle of the crapometer were Grey’s Anatomy and Brothers & Sisters. Grey’s escapes the bottom of the barrel if only for the fact that they’ve already set the precedent for truly horrible television. Calling any one episode of the show “awful” would be a statement too bold for most scenarios and, indeed, this one. After putting her core cast through the much expected, self-inquisitory ringer, Shondra Rhimes leaves us in an enticingly grey (hey-o!) area over the return of accused homophobe, and all around douche bag, Isaiah Washington. On Brothers & Sisters, Sally Field and Calista Flockhart once again proved how invested they are in their craft by crying on camera without makeup. Justin went off to Iraq, Ron Rifkin might be gay with Summer’s dad from The OC and Tommy’s wife looks to be suffering from a rough case of postpartum depression. But none of that was too heavy to keep the Walkers’ from ending the season by jumping into the pool together – taking back the sad site of their patriarch’s demise on the series premiere.
Oddly enough, the most satisfying story development unraveled on Desperate Housewives. Three of the leading ladies are facing serious conflict in the upcoming fourth season, one seems to have finally found the happiness she’s been fighting for since the pilot and one is probably dead. In case you haven’t already heard, last night ended with Nicolette Sheridan swinging from a hand-crafted noose. Edie’s always been the most unnecessary housewife, and series creator Marc Cherry has frequently hinted at her demise, but I still won’t buy her death until she’s good and buried. Her death would be a welcome change on the show, and I could easily see her replacing the long irrelevant Mary Alice Young as the soap’s not-of-the-living narrator. Only time will tell, but I won’t be wasting any of it mulling over the possibilities. That part of my brain is officially turned off until September.