
Of the various MLTV efforts that have recently lapsed, none seems more criminal than snubbing my monthly coverage of the Buffy comic book series. This is easily explained though. The Faith-centric, Brian K. Vaughan-penned arc that wrapped up in December didn’t really do it for me, and when it comes to the Buff, if I have nothing nice to say, I’d rather not say anything at all. Then when the two one-off stories rolled out in January and February (the latter quite impressive and the former wholly confusing), I was just too heartbroken by any mention of the series to think about it for too long. You see, too many jaunts to the West Coast in the last six months left me without the means to hit the Buffy reunion at the Paley Festival last week, so blogging was just more salt for m’wounds. It will honestly haunt me for the rest of my life, but since it’s over, I can finally bring myself to discuss this latest development: earlier this month, Buffy dyked out.
Well, kinda. As you may have already read in any one of the many pubs who picked this up, in the 12th issue of the new Buffy series (the first of the Wolves at the Gate arc), Buffy and her right-hand slayer, Satsu, got naked and did naked things. Satsu had been revealed in the previous issue to be in love with Buffy and the supplier of the extremely cheese smooch that woke her up from that magic coma about a year ago. Buffy spurned her advances, explained that, in addition to the fact that she likes boys, bad things typically come to the ones who pursue her. Cut to the next issue when the two are found in bed together. Buffy is comically and typically frazzled, and over the course of a couple pages, nearly all of the Scoobies walk in on the pair. Shock, outrage, drooling fanboys and surprisingly speedy acceptance ensue.
Joss Whedon maintains that Buffy is not going to become a lesbian and that this move was just experimentation that evolved naturally. I’m not one to ever question the almighty Joss, but I am firmly in the camp of people not feeling this latest story. This is not because I’m a prude. I have a pretty laissez-faire attitude about sexuality. But this doesn’t seem natural for me at all, and Buffy, who by my estimates is at least 25 at this point, is getting a little old for the window where “experimentation” seems an acceptable excuse. Most importantly, she’s always really, really, really liked boys – to a fault! And no amount of loneliness or boredom seems like it could justify her switching teams for one night – especially when the other involved has genuine feelings. Buffy is supposed to be over using people.
I digress. What’s done is done, and no amount of gratuitous girl-on-girl is going to keep me from running to Midtown Comics the first Wednesday every month… even if I do occasionally fail to report on the developments. And developments, while we’re on the topic, showed up in spades in issue 12. Lesbian canoodling was accompanied by the return of Andrew and Dracula, and a troupe of magical Harajuku girl vampires, who can turn into animals and, um, fog, that stole Buffy’s super scythe. To get it back, the gang will be heading to Tokyo for the next three issues. We don’t know exactly how yet, but this will culminate in Buffy traveling through time to hang out/bitch fight with that future slayer from the comic book series I still haven’t read. It’s officially on my list of things to do.

Brenda Strong – Narrating Desperate Housewives can’t be that time consuming – those scripts practically read themselves! Besides, I’m sick of the ridiculously awesome Strong being stuck as the invisible, omniscient housewife. It’s about time she stepped back in front of the camera and Psych is a perfect venue. And since Shawn’s mom definitely has a dose of nasty for being a big, fat baby-abandoner, Strong could play the character like she did Elaine’s evil, bra-less nemesis on Seinfeld.
Kristine Sutherland - If I was a TV orphan, I know who I’d want to adopt me, and it’s not Angelina. Before she met her heartbreaking end on Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Sutherland played the slayer’s mother, Joyce, to the point of parental perfection. It wasn’t that she was sweet (she was a straight up badass when circumstances demanded it) – Joyce was just real. In the parallel universe where she starts acting again and nabs this role, I’d love to see her play it as a middle-aged tart – a la “
Kate Jackson – Nothing beats a vintage hottie, and my favorite of Charlie’s Angels was always the understated and brainy Sabrina. Shawn’s dad may have taught him how to be crazy observant, but where did he learn the rest of his detectivin’ skills? I can just picture a flashback of Jackson teaching little Shawn how to jimmy car doors. Either way, this gal doesn’t make enough appearances! If she doesn’t join the Psych crew, can’t we at least find her a spot on Dancing With The Stars?
Phylicia Rashad – Who’s to say that woman at the door really is Shawn’s mother? She could be there to tell him that his real mother is actually… Mrs Burton! No, Shawn isn’t black, and sure, something like this would have probably come up, but come on! Rashad is the undisputed queen of TV moms, and her recent appearance as Gus’s on the Psych Christmas special was far too brief. Bringing her back would be really fun for the Shawn/Gus dynamic.



It seems fitting that this month’s sidetrack into the world of television-related comic books fall on the first day of Comic-Con – which I unfortunately am not attending. One blessed week ahead of schedule, the fifth installment of the eighth season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer is on the shelves. It marks the first stand-alone issue and the last to be penned by Joss Whedon for an indefinite amount of time. Apparently a story he was quite anxious to tell, 